Many of you might be surprised to see the bride doing a speech which is quite unconventional. But then again, when the bride is a very talkative person, this shouldn’t surprise you!
The bride is often the person who steals the limelight on a wedding day. But truthfully, it’s not hers alone. This day also belongs to the person I have just married. And sadly, many weddings don’t speak about how great the groom is and I don’t think anyone can do that better than me.
I’d be quite worried if anyone else could! I didn’t tell him how wonderful he was at his 21st so here’s your speech, my Darling.
Brendan was a guy I never thought I’d like, never mind marry. He was loved by all the popular girls in my grade at school and was far from the Prince Charming I was looking for. Prince Charming was tall and hopelessly romantic and…the list went on. Brendan loved muscle vests, loud music and was the type of guy who didn’t buy his sweetheart flowers every Valentines. I can clearly remember looking at him one day after becoming friends with him and thinking, Imagine if I married a guy like Brendan. He flirted with me between one or two relationships and I suppose I did too, not thinking something would come from it. But one day I found myself falling for him and the feeling just grew. I thought he would jump at the chance to ask me out but it took him a good four months and I remember countless times talking to many different people and being frustrated he wasn’t making a move. When he eventually asked me out, I didn’t see our relationship getting us to marriage, until the third week when one night he told me that he wanted to spend the rest of his life with me. That was just under seven years ago. Looking back I can scarcely believe the time has gone so fast. But I know that waiting for this day was an eternity! I can still remember the day he kissed me goodnight and whispered, only six more years!!!
Well here we are and I can tell you, I never thought this day would come.
I am a typical, hopeless romantic and was looking for a fairytale. God gave me something better. Rather than a shallow make-believe tale, he gave me a real relationship with a man that has moulded me and also challenged me at times.
But through it all, He has honed and shaped us into the married couple we are today.
My picture perfect man wasn’t someone who had endured hardship or hadn’t been a Christian for the first part of his life. Those factors didn’t fit nicely in the picture. But as He always does, God had other plans.
When Brendan came into my life, all the things that I’d been so removed from, things that happened to other people had happened to him. And suddenly, the reality of life was a rude awakening from the blessed and protected life I’d been living.
I remember thinking how, spiritually, I was so much stronger and knew so much more than him. I wondered how he would ever lead me and if he’d ever have the wisdom I expected…the wisdom of my most respected man…my Dad.
At this point, it was pointed out to me that Brendan was a good twenty-something years younger than my father and I shouldn’t expect that kind of wisdom for awhile.
What I never thought possible was that I’d learn so much from him. He would learn in a few years, more than I’d learnt in a lifetime about the Bible and God. His relationship would grow and become stronger with God than mine had ever been. That he would change from a babe magnet to, and honestly not being biased, to the most godly young man I knew.
Through him, God taught me so much. He taught me about the importance of family. He showed me how He could change a boy with a fairly casual faith into a man that fought for his Father God. The boy I once knew became someone with such wisdom and godliness that the boy I dated isn’t the same person as the man I’ve just married! (Can’t believe I can say that now!!)
For many years, and still in some ways, I’ve tried to squash Brendan into my fairytale story. And each time, he’d pop out of the mould and wouldn’t fit, much to my frustration. He has taught me to release my control on my life and hand it over to God. And this is one way that he has done it by the way he lived and not by physically telling me to let go.
Brendan never fit my mould, because he was never meant to. My mould was imperfect and impractical. It didn’t produce the durability and strength in a man that was needed to get us through life. It didn’t have the imperfections it needed so that when we slipped up we’d depend on God. It looked perfect but didn’t produce a man that could stand firm in trying times because of his faith. It didn’t produce the type of guy that I needed to be stronger than my controlling attitude. It wouldn’t produce a man who would stand up against me and guide me.
My mould produced a man who would worship my every command. My mould produced a man that fit the fairytale. A man untouched by the world, a world where relying on God is what brings him through. No, Brendan certainly didn’t come from my mould. And now I realise that if he did I would have a wife worshipping, wimp of a man behind the red cloak and Ken hairstyle and square jaw line.
God’s mould was so much better. From His, he produced a man, accustomed to trials of life, a man that was strong, but had the needed emotion I desired. This man God produced is stronger than me, he is protector, my sanity, my guider, my rock, my God lover, my best friend and the love of my life. Through this man, God has provided my every need and desire for a Prince Charming, a Prince Charming of reality. The real Prince Charming belongs in the perfection of a fairytale, because in this world, he would wish upon a star very quickly that he was back in fantasy land. Mine’s forever and God has given me a man that will last.
And in all honesty, my Prince Charming can’t steal the show. There’s a Prince of Peace that is much greater than him and he belongs to us too.
So I guess, I have the best deal, two Princes, one for this life and one for the next.
So to my Prince Charming that God has given me for this life, I commit my life, my love and my everything to you! I have waited seven years to be your wife and I cannot wait for the journey we are about to start together, joined together as one flesh by the Prince of Peace! I love you!
Photo Credit: Kim Kerry Photography
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